I Dreamt of Things: The Oracle

I dreamt I went to see The Oracle. I stood in her kitchen waiting for her sage advice. When she turned to speak to me, her hair stood on end, her fangs came out, and she snarled and growled at me.

I Dreamt of Things... A Covered Wagon

I dreamt that Matt and I took two horses and a covered wagon on a joyride through the city streets.

I Dreamt of Things: Sand Storm

I dreamt of an immense windstorm. Dust blew all around, darkening the sky as far as the eye could see. Sand dunes buried all the local homes. No one seemed to notice. Everyone went about their business as usual.

I Dreamt of Things: Dinner in the Sky

 

I dreamt that Matt and I were having dinner high up in the sky atop a small round pedestal.

I Dreamt of Things: A Tiny Plane

I dreamt I was on a tiny plane (apparently all the people were the sizes of Smurfs)... And the plane was in some kind of apartment, or office space, or something. After everyone boarded the tiny plane, it took off in the living room (or maybe the kitchen). But the plane just kept circling around the interior space of this building and couldn’t find a way out. Someone suggested that maybe there wasn’t enough power for the plane to exit the building. So the pilot ended up plugging the nose of the plane into an outlet at the top of a chandelier hanging from the ceiling. Only the chandelier wasn't a nice one, it was just a few incandescent light bulbs hanging down. The gist of this scene is an airplane plugged into an outlet at the top of a bald chandelier.

I Dreamt of Things: Bouncy Floor

I dreamt of a yoga room with the typical hardwood floors. Suspended about 8 inches above the floor was a bouncy, transparent film, pulled tight along the edges of the room. It looked like people were hovering over the floor when they walked. It was a little bit like an invisible trampoline.

I Dreamt of Things: Gun in My Face

I dreamt I was in a courtroom where a kid freaked out and shoved me onto the ground and put a gun in my face. Another kid jumped up and put a gun in the first kid’s face. Everyone froze in place. It was like I was in a cheesy 80’s cop/courtroom drama.

I Dreamt of Things: My Dad

I dreamt of a rainy nighttime road trip up the California coast with my dad. He was driving and singing to himself while I snoozed in the back seat. When I woke up and tried to talk to him, he didn’t respond. I don’t think he knew I was there.

I Dreamt of Things

I dreamt of a crustacean infestation in my living room, all because my friend Brigid wanted to sell her Mercedes on Craigslist.

I Dreamt of Things...

My dreaming dry spell was finally broken last night. When I woke up I was left with impressions from (count them) FOUR strange scenes:

1. I was at a theater seeing a play with my friend Lisa. There was a fire and the place was rapidly filling with smoke. People were evacuating. I was crawling around on the floor looking for my keys as several theater employees began to vacuum the carpets all around me.

2. I was sitting at a big table eating cream of wheat. I didn't have a bowl. My friend came up and sat across from me. She poured her bowl of macaroni salad all over my cream of wheat. Gross!

3. I worked in a skyscraper, and I had to walk up a very tall flight of stairs to get to my floor. The stairs were situated on the outside of the building and they were only about 12 inches wide. There was no railing. I carefully made my way up about 15 stories to the top of the staircase, only to realize that the door to my office was still another 20 feet away. I just stood there.

4. Everyone working in my office showed up with afros. The boss lady said she was going to reprimand Harriet because her afro just wasn’t big enough.

I Dreamt of Things...

Last night was a weird one. I had three disconcerting dreams...

1. Matt and I came home to a house we lived in. Inside was a long, dark black cobra coiled up waiting to strike. It chased us out of our house and we sat in the car as it stared at us from the outside.

2. As I placed some papers on the bed, a spider came crawling out. Matt kept trying to catch it but it was too quick. Finally, its belly swelled up to the size of a basketball and exploded all over everything.

3. I was in an airport trying to get home. There was a strange trolley system — it was like a train of grocery carts with seats that carried people around the airport. I was pregnant, but I didn’t want to be. I sat on my little cart jerking down the tracks, waiting to arrive at my destination so I could go home ... but there was no destination. I had nowhere to go. (p.s. I’m not actually pregnant, thank goodness!)

I Dreamt of Things...

I dreamt that I had a giant Russian Tea Cookie the size of a beach ball. I held it in my arms as I proceeded to gnaw on it like a mouse would a huge piece of cheese.

Here’s my favorite (and easy) recipe for Russian Tea Cookies... These are Matt’s favorite!

1 cup butter
1/2 cup powdered sugar
3/4 cup pecans
2 1/4 cups flour
1/4 tsp salt
1 tsp vanilla

Cream butter and powdered sugar. Add vanilla, then flour, salt, and pecans. Chill for an hour. Roll into balls. Bake at 325° for 25 minutes. Roll in powdered sugar after they have finished baking.

YUM!

I Dreamt of Things...

I dreamt that Matt and I were outrunning some gang-bangers in my dad’s light green 1974 Dodge Dart Swinger. For some reason the gas pedal was really far away and I had to streeeeeeeetch to reach it.

I Dreamt of Things...

I dreamt that I was trying to speak with a couple people at a yoga studio. I had just eaten a piece of candy that one of them gave me. The candy kept getting bigger and stickier in my mouth, which caused quite a bit of difficulty as I tried to communicate.

I Dreamt of Things...

I dreamt that I was attacked by a big black raven in a small, dark, musty, old staircase with faded blue carpeting.

Perhaps this dream came to me because I mentioned to Matt last night as we watched the Baltimore Ravens in a football game, “They are called the Ravens because Edgar Allen Poe lived in Baltimore.” Matt replied, “Uh-huh.”

I Dreamt of Things...

I dreamt that I had to give a big presentation with a bunch of other women in an auditorium full of people. We put together a broadway-style show complete with brightly colored costumes, song, and dance. We sang our lungs out about womens’ power and strength. Our big finale was a Cirque du Soleil swinging acrobatic performance on ropes above the audience. After the presentation, Tom Cruise came up to us and complimented our work, saying he never realized women could be so powerful.

I Dreamt of Things...

Last night I dreamt of a big, beautiful, historic library. The library had a big bell tower with a winding staircase. There were stained-glass windows and multicolored light streamed into this lonely space.

In contrast to the quiet space of the bell tower, the library’s lobby was bustling with activity. There was a litter of six or eight puppies wearing big florescent-colored sombreros being cared for by six or eight little Mexican boys. The puppies were running around the library and the boys were chasing them.

Every time I tried to leave the library, a security guard would come and hold me down as I screamed, and someone would give me a tranquilizer shot. They would hold me down until I fell asleep.